Why my husband is so strong...

On Monday, Pablo went to his radiation treatment. When he was about to leave the radiation room, a doctor walked in and told him to sit down. She proceeded to tell him that his tumour is spreading and it is now believed to be cancerous. The only way to know for sure is to do a biopsy. This doctor then told him that he'll most likely need chemotherapy and possibly another surgery. The real kicker - she said that if this doesn't work, Pablo will have 9 - 12 months to live.

Pablo told me this many hours after he found out.
He didn't want me to know.
He didn't want me to worry.
He didn't want me to be upset.

And again I lost it.
It was April 16 - April 26 all over again.
I never wanted to feel like that again...to be that sad, angry, pissed, depressed, hopeless.

The doctor that told Pablo this news was not his oncologist.

Every Tuesday, Pablo is supposed to see his oncologist after his treatment.
Pablo wanted him to confirm or deny this news and he wanted to hear it alone.
So I went to work today and IT SUCKED. I felt like shit all day. (Thanks Dianne for trying to cheer me up!)

Pablo spoke to his oncologist and here is what the oncologist confirmed:
The oncologist does want Pablo to have a biopsy.
They are under the suspicion that what is left of the tumour might now be cancerous.
He confirmed that the doctor overreacted yesterday and he apologized and said it wouldn't happen again.
Once the biopsy is done, then we'll know where to go from there...

Again, in the words of my late Nonna (grandmother):
(cause I'm too tired to come up with all the expletives I'd like to put here...)


  1. my heart breaks for you and your family. here's to hoping for the best.

  2. Oh sweetie. I'm thinking of you all. Hugs.

  3. Loads of blessings from Mexico.
    Strength, clarity and serenity above all.
    Waiting for the good news to come.

  4. Julia, good news MUST come SOON!!!

    Three years ago my colleague's husband had a tumour somewhere around his jaw, next to his lymph nodes - so it was very dangerous. He had a really serious surgery (there was a risk that his jaw would have to be amputated) but all went well - after that we had a series of radiation treatment and now he is perfectly healthy! I'm sure the same will be with Pablo!!!

    All the best and big hugs from Poland!

  5. ((((((Julia)))))),


    I hope (I pray) that that isn't true.

    But, I do have to say you've got some real BASTARD doctors up there. She had no right to step all over another doctor's patient like that. And she could do with some heavy-duty sensitivity training.

    Man, I wish you lived closer. We've got better doctors in the U.S. I could HUG you. I could sit with you.

    You're right ... Pablo is amazing. Tell him he doesn't have to handle this alone. You guys have got a world's worth of prayers and love and support behind you.

    Marysia is right ... we can all picture a DIFFERENT ... a **BETTER** outcome for Pablo (and you). Try not to take in negative, shitty messages from rude, crude, heartless people and make them your own. There are TONS more people out here that can see a BETTER way ... a HEALTHIER way for both of you.

    I pray every day, Julia+Pablo, I pray every day. Bless you all.


  6. Big, big hugs to you both; and really hoping things start looking up soon.

  7. I was telling my french teacher about what's going on - because she was telling me some good stuff that's been happening to her lately and how god is on her side and she's so happy at how her life has been going lately...and I was telling her God is not doing great things for Pablo. So we read a couple scriptures in the french bible she had in her bag, and wrote down the numbers for me to give them to Pablo. I just might.

  8. I am so sorry to hear this. I am praying for your family.
    That Doctor needs to learn some bedside etiquette.

  9. I am so sorry to hear this and will say prayers and keep my fingers crossed that the biopsy results are negative.

  10. Sending love and encouragement.

  11. So I'm sitting here trying to think of words, any words that I might say that would bring you some comfort or alleviate some of your worry but honestly I have none. All I can do is lend you my ear and send you some prayers. I stumbled on to your site while searching for pictures of shared kids room and now that seems so inconsequential.

    I can not imagine what you are going through but I will pray for you and your family daily. You & your husband are obviously incredibly strong and thankfully so.

    I'll be around :) from now on

  12. I don't know what to say to you all. As I read these comments here at work, I am tearing up so I'll keep it brief. Thank you so much, all of you, for the support. We love you all.

  13. Oh goodness I'm in tears for you. THere are no words I just wish I could hug you hard. Put things in perspective so much. While I worry about being short on funds at this moment, not enough to get milk for this week I realize I'd rather that any day over the pain you're going thru right now. HUgs hugs and more.

  14. Thank you Leah. I'm so sorry that you are going through financial troubles. It really does make things tough as we are dealing with that on top of everything else. Big hugs back to you and I hope things get better for you. Stay positive and big hugs back to you!

  15. oh no worries here, I think things are for a reason some odd way adn we figure things out and I learn that it is so small compared to things we could be going thru. I'm so happy to read teh latest on the fact that htey were talking to the wrong patient, who the heck does that?! Sometimes I think Dr.s get in some odd world and dont think as they run around spurting things out. When my middle child was born he didn't/doesnt have one of his ears open and it's little. Right away ( literally within 5min of having him ) a doctor that wasnt mine tells me, oh he's going to be deaf, wont hear at all. Well they ran a test and turns out he was wrong and now he's almost 6 and hears amazingly well even with one closed off. Goes to show us even when they say something they dont play God they dont get to decide we just must be strong and fight thru it. Hugs and love your way to you and your family



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